I had sex magick in the hot tub Sunday. Typically one would expect another party to appear in this scene, but it was truly just me, the Unseen, the water, and Spirit.
It was totally spontaneous, the ritual. There was no scripting, no premeditation. In fact, it arose simply because of this span of time where I was safely relaxed and alone but for my partner. It is difficult to recall how it got underway; I recall choosing to relax, advising my partner I’d be going within, and attempting to relax & release just enough while still maintaining just enough awareness/will to adjust my experience.
Somewhere within, it arose that I should allow myself to experience the sacred touch of Nature. I gift this touch to others readily, but to allow the divinity of all that’s around me to truly touch and penetrate me, was what was suggested. I didn’t question it or overanalyze it. I attempted to allow the breeze, the temperature, the swirling warmth beneath me, the sunshine, the expanse of sky beyond it, the rumbling of the tub motors, the birdsong, to mingle into a sweet full-bodied caress. To allow myself to melt, to release my ideas & limitations and succumb to the sense of Infinite, Sexual, Alive Oneness right there, in the tub. I swam & floated in that eternally grateful and blissful state for some time.
I began to use my breath and imagination to visualize golden, white-hot light to rise the back of my body, then rain from my forehead in prickly needly coolness down my front. Breathing and pumping my kegels in time, I fell into a swing & sway. With the golden white, I imagined pure goodness, healing, vital life. With the prickly ether, I imagined a void which was alive, absorbing and dispelling all that was unnecessary, moot, inert. The golden light grew hotter, the water grew hotter, it felt like my breathing became belabored, and rather than reach a crest, I realized that as I focused on and then regulated my breath, I could spread that ecstatic pinnacle and extend it, both through time, and across my body. I’d relax and melt into this new plateau, keeping up the rhythm, for perhaps two more cycles, before moving along to more private dalliances…